We all need a second chance. This is not a perfect world, and we are not perfect people. I’m probably on my thousandth-second opportunity right now, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Because even though I missed a lot, that means I tried a lot too.
Things rarely turn out well the first time. Almost every significant achievement in a person’s life begins with the decision to try again and again – to get up after every failed attempt and give yourself another chance.
The only difference between an opportunity and any obstacle is your attitude. Getting a second chance at life is allowing yourself to grow beyond past mistakes. It is about positively adjusting your attitude towards future possibilities. Here’s how:
Is your life not what you expected? 12 ways to have a second chance at life
1. Let go of the past.
What has been done is done. When life throws nasty curvy balls at us, it usually doesn’t make any sense to us, and our natural emotional reaction might be to get very upset and shout obscenities. But how does this help our dilemma? Obviously, it doesn’t.
“No one can go back and start again, but anyone can start today and make a new end.” – Maria Robinson
The smartest, and sometimes the most difficult thing we can do in this type of situation is to be more temperate in our reactions. Wanting to shout obscenities, but you must be wiser and more disciplined than that. Remember that emotional anger only makes things worse and, that tragedies are seldom as bad as they seem, and even when they are, they give us a chance to grow stronger.
Every awkward moment in our lives is accompanied by an opportunity for personal growth and creativity. However, to achieve this growth and creativity, we must first learn to let go of the past. We must recognize that difficulties pass, like everything in life. And once they pass, we are all left with experiences that are unique and lessons needed to make a better attempt the next time.
2. Learning the lesson.
Everything in life is a lesson. Everyone you know, everything you meet, etc. They are all part of the learning experience we call “life.”
Never forget to be thankful for the lesson, especially when things don’t go as planned. If you didn’t get the business deal you wanted or a relationship doesn’t work, it just means something else better is out there waiting. And the lesson you just learned is the first step toward it.
3. Lose the negative attitude.
The law of cause and effect states that Negative thinking generates negative results. Positive thinking produces positive results.
Each of the other suggestions in this article will be irrelevant if your mind is stuck. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. Our mind has to believe that it can do something before it can do it. For a practical orientation on positive thinking, I recommend reading The Power of Positive Thinking.
4. Accept total responsibility for your current situation.
If you don’t take total responsibility for your life, someone else will. And when they do, you will become a slave to their ideas and dreams, instead of prioritizing yours.
You are the only one who can directly control the outcome of your life. And no, it won’t always be easy. Each person has a lot of obstacles in front of him. You must take full responsibility for your situation and overcome these obstacles. Choosing not to do so means you are giving up.
5. Focus on the things you can change.
Some forces are out of your control. The best thing you can do is, do the best with what is in front of you, using the resources that you do have access to.
Wasting your time, talent, and emotional energy on things that are out of your control is the recipe for frustration, misery, and stagnation. Invest your enthusiasm in the things you can change.
6. Find out what you really want.
You’re going to be running on a hamster wheel forever if you don’t decide where you want to go. Find out what is meaningful to you, and so you can be what you were born for.
“Whenever you want to achieve something, keep your eyes open, concentrate and make sure you know exactly what it is you want. No one can hit their target with their eyes closed.” – Paulo Coelho
Some of us were born to be musicians, to communicate complex moving thoughts and feelings with the strings of a guitar. Some of us were born to be poets, to touch people’s hearts with exquisite prose. Some of us were born to be entrepreneurs and create growth and opportunity where others see trash. And yet, some of us were born to be or do whatever, specifically, moves you.
Don’t just quit because it didn’t go well on the first try, and don’t waste your life fulfilling someone else’s dreams and wishes. You must follow your intuition and make the decision not to give up what you are capable of becoming.
7. Eliminate the non-essential.
First, identify the essentials, the things in your life that matter most to you. Then remove the lint. This drastically simplifies things and leaves you with a clean, fresh, solid base to build on without unnecessary interference. This process works with any aspect of your life; work projects, relationships, general task lists, etc.
Remember, you cannot achieve anything if you are trying to accomplish everything. Concentrate on the essentials. Get rid of the rest. The Joy of Less Open in a new window It is good reading material on this topic.
8. Be very specific.
When setting new goals, try to be as specific as possible. “I want to lose ten pounds” is a goal that you can try to achieve. “I want to lose weight” is not. Knowing the specific measures of what we want to achieve is the only way you will have to reach the final result you want.
Also, be specific with your actions too. “I’m going to exercise” is not clear. It is too ambiguous. “I’m going to jog 30 minutes every day at 18:00” is something you can do (something you can create a routine with), something you can measure.
9. Focus on DOING instead of DON’T.
“Don’t think about eating that chocolate!” What are you thinking about now? In eating chocolate, right? When you focus on not thinking about something, you end up thinking about it.
The same philosophy applies when you try to break bad habits. By regularly trying not to do something, we end up thinking about it so much that we subconsciously provoke ourselves into cheating, doing precisely what we are trying not to do.
“Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.” – Alexander Graham Bell
Instead of focusing on eliminating bad habits, focus on creating good habits (those that happen by replacing bad ones). For example, if you are trying to get rid of junk food pecking, you can create a new mental habit like this: “At 3:00 PM every day, at the time when I usually feel like a snack, I will eat five cookies. whole wheat.” After a few weeks or months of concentrating on this good habit, it will become part of your routine. You are going to start doing the right thing without even thinking about it.
10. Create a daily routine.
It is so simple, but creating a daily routine for you can change your life. The most productive habits that I have found go from the beginning of the day to the end. That means, develop a routine for when you wake up, for the first job you have, for when you finish your job, and for an hour or two before going to sleep.
Doing so will help you start each day on point, and end each day in a way that will prepare you for tomorrow. It will help you focus on the essential things, rather than the distractions that keep popping up. And most importantly, it will help you to progress regularly, which is what second chances are all about.
11. Maintain your self-control and work on it.
The harder you work, the luckier you will be. Stop waiting for things to work.
While many of us decide, at some point in the course of our lives, that we want to pursue our vocation, only a few of us work on it. By “work on it,” I mean that they dedicate themselves to the result. The rest of us never act on our decision. Or, at best, we pretend to work by putting in an uninspired, half-hearted effort.
“If we keep doing what we’re doing, we’re going to keep getting what we’re getting.” – Stephen Covey
If you want a real second chance, you have to be willing to give it everything you have. Do not loosen! This means that you have to strengthen and maintain your self-control. The best way I found to do this is to take one small elephant bite at a time.
Start with a single activity and make a plan to see how you will deal with problems when they arise. For example, if you are trying to lose weight, make a list of healthy foods that you can eat when cravings for snacks appear.
It will be difficult at first, but it will get easier. And that is the point. As your strength grows, you will be able to take on more significant challenges.
Remember, life is not easy, especially when you plan to achieve something worthwhile. Achieving your dreams can take a lot of work, even the second time. You are ready for that then read Getting Things Done
12. Forget about impressing people.
Lots of people buy things they don’t need, with money they don’t have, to impress people they don’t know. Or some variant of it …
Don’t be one of those people. It’s a waste of time. And it’s probably one of the reasons why you need a second chance in the first place.
Just keep doing what you know is right. And if it doesn’t work, adjust your focus and try again. You will arrive on time.
“Life is a lot more easier when you are living it to impress your positive inner-self. Most people are quite hard to impress; so why waste your time and energy trying to impress them?” – Edmond Mbiaka
The best thing you can do is give yourself a second chance and keep trying. You should never be afraid to keep trying, fear of failure, fear of sadness, fear of dreams. That defence would only shut us up more in ourselves and we would live safely, but in monotony, knowing deep down that nothing can be accomplished. Errors teach us, the more you fail, the more you will learn, then that curve will change and you will be hitting more and failing less. Keep this in mind for difficult times.