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What to do when you fail: Here are 6 strategies to take

You have to approach failure with a positive spirit and keep moving forward despite the falls. Because each fall brings us even closer to success.



What to do when you fail

Have you ever consider the thought if you know what to do when you fail?

Unfortunately, many people are afraid of failure. What if I told you that failure announces your success?

Even if failure is not pleasant to live at the moment, it is part of life. We all experience setbacks. It’s normal.

Before learning to walk, we all fell several times, but we all continued until we were standing on our two feet. At that age, we were not aware of the failure.

We had one goal, to walk like the “grown-ups,” so we knew it was possible. And we tried until we got there.

Are you ready to find out what to do when you fail?

Failure Means You Try

In his book, The Virtues of Failure, Josiah Bulus says, “Failure and defeat are the greatest teachers of life.” Failure is not a bad thing unless you consider it as such.

“Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is a delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” – Denis Waitley

Unfortunately, many people put all their energy and focus on their problems rather than looking for a solution. No wonder when they “fall” – when they fail – they have trouble getting up.

You have to approach failure with a positive spirit and keep moving forward despite the falls because each fall brings us even closer to success.

Think of the baby who learns to walk!

If you’ve experienced a failure recently or have one shortly (which is inevitable!), Here are six strategies to take.

1. Be Content

The reason you have to be happy when you fail is that you have to associate failure with success. Failure is a good thing because it means that you are doing something.

I believe that the real failure in life is not to try to do nothing.

Many people are so afraid of failing that they do nothing, they are paralyzed.

They have been disappointed many times in the past that they don’t see the point of trying again. Their goals, their dreams fly away, but they stay put, while others around them flourish.

“Do not be discouraged, it is often the last key to the keychain that opens the door”, Zig Ziglar

2. Ask Yourself Why You Failed

You have to accept responsibility for your mistakes. You are responsible for the actions you take. If you accuse others of being accountable for your failures, then you will never progress.

By accepting responsibility for your failures, you will learn not to fall into the same trap.

Whenever you fail or make a mistake, ask yourself, “Why did I fail, and what would I have done differently to have a different result?”.

First, your mind will give you all the negative reasons why you failed. However, I encourage you to change your perspective.

A bad situation may make you stronger mentally and emotionally.

From experience, I can say that all of my mistakes and failures have made me a better person because I have learned from it so that I no longer fall into the same traps.

When you adopt this mindset, all of a sudden, you will perceive failure as a step towards the life you want to have.

When you fail, hold on to the positive and then keep going.

3. Ask for Help

Don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask for help. It is difficult to succeed when playing solo. Be humble and put your ego aside.

Everyone who has succeeded has been helped at one time or another. This is one of the keys to their success.

Some people will help you avoid pain and disappointment. Don’t reinvent the wheel. Instead, learn from the mistakes of others.

It can be through a coach, consultant, mentor or therapist. Sometimes a person, an idea or any support can change our whole life.

4. Change Your Approach and Adapt

Failure means that you tried something and it didn’t work. Failure is simply a negative result. Thomas Edison experienced thousands of negative consequences before his inventions, which revolutionized the world! And he is far from alone.

Learn from your failures and change your approach until it works. Taking a new approach will allow you to improve your decision-making process. And you will end up adopting the right action plan.

“If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you will still get what you’ve always got,” John Maxwell

5. Become Stronger With Failure

In many people, failure affects their personality. Do not fall into this trap. Failure is not YOU, and YOU are not a failure. It is only a negative result of an experiment. Failure is typical, and it precedes success. So each time you fail, you will gain confidence because

1) you have taken action and
2) you have learned a life lesson.

I “encourage” you to take massive action and make as many mistakes as possible. This means that the more you fail, the faster you will become stronger and the quicker you will succeed.

6. Believe In Yourself

From experience, I tend to believe, even if it is not rational, that nothing happens by chance. Everything that happens to me, in the end, is for my good.

“Successful people have fear, successful people have doubts, and successful people have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them.” –T. Harv Eker

Failure is positive if you want to get stronger. If you approach each failure with this mindset, then you could dare everything and achieve maximum success in your life.

And one can even ask the question, “does failure really exist or is it simply a construction of the mind?”.


Building Self-confidence: Discover the 7 keys to improve it

Self-confidence is a crucial aspect of our relationship with ourselves.

However, we are all aware that numerous factors can influence our self-confidence: past negative experiences, failures, critical feedback, or longstanding “labels” that have been placed upon us. In reality, self-confidence is not a fixed trait that one either possesses or lacks; rather, it is a dynamic quality that fluctuates over time. It’s perfectly normal for everyone to experience moments of low self-confidence.



Addressing and enhancing self-confidence is becoming increasingly vital in a world where demands and expectations continue to rise. Self-confidence plays a pivotal role in achieving success and maintaining overall well-being. When self-confidence is lacking, it can lead to emotional distress and impact how we carry ourselves and how others perceive and interact with us.

Practical Steps to Building Self-Confidence

To counteract this destructive dynamic, here are foundational and practical steps to enhance your self-confidence, boost your self-esteem, and cultivate a positive self-image that works in your favor.

1. Evaluating Your Options with a clear mind.

By adopting a perspective that distances you from your own actions and viewing them as an external observer, you gain the ability to act and view them as an external observer. You can identify situations and habits where you may be self-sabotaging.

This self-analysis is a potent tool that empowers you to take control of your self-image and can lead to significant personal growth.

If you’ve struggled with low self-esteem for an extended period, Suppose you’ve struggled with low self-esteem for an extended period. In that case, you may have fallen into a cycle of anxiety and hostile self-perception that’s challenging to break without deliberate effort.

Taking a third-person viewpoint lets you see this cycle objectively, making it easier to take constructive action.

Do you know how you can do this? It’s simple. When you encounter something that triggers distress and undermines your self-confidence, pause and consider the various options available to address the situation.

Choose the option you believe will benefit you long-term and support your well-being.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” – Eleanor Roosevelt.

The key: Challenge Yourself to Break Out of Your Comfort Zone.

To overcome the inclination to remain within your comfort bubble, it’s essential to ensure that your concept of what’s “best” for the long term isn’t solely influenced by a desire for convenience.

If you’re seeking to approach things differently, you must be willing to step outside your comfort zone.

For instance, imagine you receive a lower grade than expected on an academic paper. The easiest choice might be to do nothing, but by requesting a review of the corrections and asking for feedback on your mistakes, you’re likely to gain valuable insights even if confronting your errors feels uncomfortable.

2. Addressing Negative Habits: Taking Action for Change

This detached perspective should not only guide your choices of action but also serve as a method for identifying thoughts that undermine your self-confidence. Developing a positive self-image is not about achieving an entirely objective view of yourself (which is impossible, given the complexity of self-awareness), but rather about cultivating a self-image that serves you well.

The key difference in building a positive self-image lies in selective attention. When you lack self-regard, all the information about yourself and your actions passes through a filter that casts everything in a pessimistic light.

As a result, you may tend to focus closely on what goes wrong while overlooking your accomplishments. Since this bias persists regardless of your efforts, use it to your advantage! Recognizing and challenging unfair thoughts about yourself will help diminish their impact.

Changing your thoughts to work in your favor.

As you see the amount of unrealistic negative thoughts about yourself, you will become more aware of your ability to actively participate in building adequate levels of self-confidence, because you will realize that what you knew about yourself was skewed by your mood.

You can also turn things around by fighting back with positive thoughts and paying more attention to the things that speak well about you. This will not only change your perception of your personality, but will also make you act differently and, as a final effect, will improve your levels of self-confidence.

3. Stop always comparing yourself to the same people

You should stop comparing yourself to other people. If you can’t help but compare yourself, it’s because you probably don’t know them well enough. Nowadays social networks and the media make it very easy for specific people to offer only their best side and keep many other things under lock and key. And all this, with or without a paid image consultant.

The importance of feeling comfortable with yourself

Recognizing the importance of feeling comfortable with yourself involves reflecting on everyday behaviors, such as carefully selecting photos for virtual profiles or choosing words with precision. While you may invest time and effort into curating your online presence, it’s likely that those following your updates are even more invested in presenting you as a captivating individual.

Therefore, part of building self-confidence includes transitioning from idealizing others to humanizing them, acknowledging their imperfections and the gaps in our knowledge about them.

It’s essential to acknowledge how our thought processes can be influenced by selective attention, which is often amplified by mass media and the internet, limiting our exposure to certain information. This awareness leads us to an important realization.

4. Recognize the effects that propaganda has on your self-esteem

Self-confidence and self-esteem are closely related, and that is why you should pay attention to both if you want to intervene on your possibilities to change your attitude and emotional style. However, there are very powerful propaganda and advertising devices that are almost exclusively in charge of offering niche markets to large organizations by creating insecurities for people.

If you are a woman, for example, you may have realized that there is great media pressure to pressure women with the ideal of feminine beauty, something that ultimately does not exist. Something similar happens with practically all the elements of our life: architecture, cars, the personalities of movie heroes, etc.

Detoxify the ideals of film and television

Realizing that self-esteem, be it positive or negative, is something that can be learned and unlearned and influenced by media and cultural elements serves to see that a negative self-image does not reflect our own nature. Therefore, considering the social pressures that influence us is imperative to preserve the authenticity and not let the publicity sink us emotionally.

5. Ensuring good health can play a significant role in boosting self-confidence.

While self-confidence is subjective, making small, practical changes in your lifestyle can positively impact it. Developing habits like regular exercise, proper nutrition, and maintaining good hygiene are achievable steps that offer numerous benefits. These healthy practices not only contribute to physical well-being but also indirectly enhance self-esteem.

Remember, a men’s healthy body supports a healthy mind, fostering a positive self-image and overall well-being.

When our body works better, it is noticed by everyone (and also by oneself). There are multiple studies that link physical to mental well- being, so you shouldn’t underestimate this point.

6. Sleep well

Not only because of what has already been said in the previous point but because it is totally essential. Not sleeping properly produces fatigue and stress, which affects our way of interpreting things and, of course, also has an effect on the postures we adopt. It’s hard to trust yourself when you walk around with your head down all day.

7. Face realistic challenges and meet them

If you want to work on your self-confidence, you should focus your actions on thinking about the impact they will have on your self-esteem. Somehow, you must leave messages to your future self so that it is the one who reads itself with kinder eyes (in part, that is what the first point explains).

The art of setting ambitious but affordable goals

Therefore, you should see what goals or objectives, far from being useful, do nothing but damage your self-image by being unrealistic. If you want to make progress in this regard, focus on the objectives that you can tackle and launch yourself at them, without leaving it for the next day.

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How to keep your self-confidence high by renewing yourself with these 6 points

Self-confidence isn’t something you were born with. It’s something you must develop.



Photo: FreePik

Taking time out periodically to renew yourself helps you maintain the self-confidence you need for this season of intense effort.

You will come away from these experiences with a deep-rooted feeling of worth and value, apart from your current progress and status.

What is self-confidence

Self-confidence isn’t something you were born with. It’s something you must develop. Many of us were cultivated like weeds as children.

We played subordinate roles to the adults around us, who frequently reminded us of our faults and shortcomings more than the successes and abilities we have achieved.

If you had that type of childhood, you would face a unique challenge in building up your self-confidence as an adult.

Here are some essential points worth remembering to keep your confidence high and learn about yourself.

1. The most important opinion about you is the one that you hold.

Ultimately, you are responsible for your life and accountable for your actions. Therefore, nobody’s opinion about you is as important as yours.

“You have the power to heal your life, and you need to know that. We think so often that we are helpless, but we’re not. We always have the power of our minds…Claim and consciously use your power.” ― Louise L. Hay

2. The most important conversations are the ones you have with yourself.

Whether you are aware of it or not, you have a running internal conversation with yourself from the moment you wake up in the morning to the time you go to bed at night. Your thoughts and ideas are “you talking to you.”

Start getting in the habit of having conversations with yourself that are supportive and reinforcing. We know about the value of talking to people who praise us, reward us, recognize us, are happy to see us and let us know how they genuinely enjoy talking with us.

So, talk to yourself with these same qualities internally as well as audibly.

3. Develop a healthy system of internal values.

Weight what you hold to be true, good and lasting. Write down some of your values for a periodic review.

Read material that reinforces what you own to be significant in life. Discover for yourself what your beliefs are and why you believe in them.

At times, challenge yourself by having discussions or even debates with yourself. Conclude things about your life. Think about more profound issues.

Your values will significantly affect how you relate to others. The stronger your benefits are, the more significant the impact.

If you lack in internal values, you will tend to draw from and even use other people almost as a leech fastening itself to their value systems.

Instead, seek to become a server, one who can help others and give strength to others.

4. Don’t stop in your failures.

Don’t wallow in your mistakes and keep moving. Failure is not a drama. It is time to admit that not only is a failure, not a tragedy but that it can often become an actual event.

Its first asset, which is far from negligible, consists of putting us back in an attitude of humility in the face of life. It forces us to accept life as it is and not as we want or dream it.

“What sets ordinary people apart from those who are successful is the perception of failure and the way they react to it.” – John C. Maxwell

You may encounter several failures, but you must not be defeated. Remember that your difficulties and setbacks do not define you.

They just strengthen your ability to overcome them and move on.

5. Stop demanding perfection of yourself.

An A score is usually awarded to the person who scores 90 percent or better, and sometimes the score doesn’t even need to be that high.

A passing grade can be as low as 60 percent. Elections are frequently won with 51 percent, as is majority stock holding!

Give your best effort and continue to move forward. Perfection is not only unrealistic to expect and virtually impossible to achieve, but it dramatically discourages your ability to move forward.
The person who is continually looking over his or her shoulder at what might have been done better can’t possibly be focussed on his/her future.

Stay focus on what’s ahead when driving, and don’t drive by concentrating on the rearview mirror.

6. Give your best to each task.

Countless individuals say when confronted with a chore, “I m too good to be doing this.” They have contempt for their current means of subsistence, their colleagues, their current situation in life.

Don’t despise your environment, your business associates, or the tasks ahead of you. Instead, encourage them and throw your-seld into giving them your best.

People who look down on their current situation will rarely do what it takes to overcome the present and achieve a better tomorrow. They are likely to be forever stuck in the present they despise.

They are dissatisfied, restless, and unhappy. Frequently, they lose the present they have and sink even more profound. They haven’t failed at their jobs, but they have been unable at themselves.

No job is too unworthy to be done well. There are no small parts, only small actors.

7. View the big picture of life.

Set back from the landscape of your life today and take a long walk, ride a bike, or jog into the countryside.

Observe the wonder and abundance of nature, and remember that everything in your world is interconnected.

You are a part of a much bigger whole. Listen to the subtle rhythms of your environment. Acknowledge that you process cycles and rhythms of change throughout your life.

Relax and open up to the vast creative and interrelated world around you.

In developing confidence, you must ultimately see yourself as a unique creation. You must recognize, with pleasure, that nobody else is just like you.

No one else has precisely your temperament, history and associations.

Nobody else has your footprints, your fingerprints, your voiceprint, your genetic DNA code. No one else has your set of capabilities, talents, and skills correctly.

You are one of a kind.

You are Unique

Marvel at your uniqueness. You have a unique contribution to render to your family, your community and the world because you have something to give.

This world will be different because of your involvement, your actions and your responses.

Most of us sell ourselves short when it comes to personal potential.

Researchers confirm again and again that we only use a fraction of our brainpower, we accomplish only a portion of what we could achieve.

But the fact is that you have virtually unlimited potential.

The confident person ultimately realizes that the impossible is possible; it just takes a little longer.

Your value is within you; it just needs to be dusted off. Your purpose is dormant within you; it just needs to be polished.

Make in each day a time for growing in self-confidence, a critical trait as you continue to work hard and give of yourself to the tasks before you.

Work hand but also remember to work smart. Luck is proper planning carefully executed.

Live inspired and, above all, work to your best. You’ll enjoy the feeling you will have at the end of your day.

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business startup

Fulfilling your wishes: The 5 obstacles that stand in the way

Because fulfilling your wishes yourself is just a wonderful feeling.



Photo: FreePik

What prevents you from fulfilling your wishes? Probably one of these five obstacles. This is how you overcome the hurdles on the way to achieving your desires.

Having wishes is something significant in itself.

Because desires are a natural driver of your life.

They ensure that you grow and develop.

And they are a form of how you can express yourself.

If a wish comes true, it is one of the most beautiful things on earth. Because then you feel great happiness. At least for a short time.

But fulfilling your wishes has another side effect: it increases your self-confidence.

In psychology, one speaks of the so-called expectation of self – efficacy. Simply put: I plan something, and I implement it.

If you succeed, then you will have confidence. Because you know: “I can do something if I want it to be.”

The dark side of your desires

But having wishes, of course, has not only good sides …

Because desires can also cause considerable frustration in your life.

If you have to fight them, If you do not reach them for a long time or do not know how to fulfill them. Then you may feel like a loser.

And then your wishes are more like a whistle for you. Because they keep showing you: you’re too stupid, somehow you can’t do it.

Wishes can then be a reason for self-judgment.

They can frustrate and discourage you. They can drive you to despair and destroy your confidence.

Because you think you’re not good enough, not smart enough, whatever isn’t enough … to reach them.

Like almost everything in life, desires are a double-edged sword.

But that’s no reason to stick your head in the sand and never wish for anything again because wishes are like salt in your meal.

They inspire you and make your life special. They keep you alive.

It is, therefore, essential to deal constructively with the obstacles on the way to your wish. And first, look them directly in the face, then grab them.

What prevents you from fulfilling your wish?

We each have our reasons. Everyone felt a “big” boulder standing in the way.

Here is a selection of the most common hurdles and how you can deal with them:

1. I have no money for it / I don’t want to spend my money on it

I anticipate this reason right away because it is often used as a homicide argument.

Yes, most of us have such a wish. Such a spinning mill, which unfortunately we cannot afford. Or where we have to hit the jackpot first to make it work. So you are not alone in this.

But instead of acting like a dreamer now and moving the good life into a future that may never come, you could still use the power of your wish for yourself.

And by asking yourself:

“Is there a smaller version of my wish?”

Example: Are you dreaming of a specific sports car?
How about renting instead of owning? Or with a test drive?

Are you dreaming of a house with a garden?
How about if you just spend your next vacation in such a house?

Or start with an allotment garden?

Or you can try to satisfy the need behind your wish.

Example: Are you dreaming of a trip around the world?
Then you might associate specific ideas with such a trip. For example, you want to feel the feeling of absolute freedom. You want to let yourself go.

Then ask yourself:

How could you possibly feel these feelings without having to travel around the world?

Even if we cannot 100% fulfill all of our wishes. We can often meet the need behind the wish with smaller means. But you need some creativity. Give it a try.

2. I want to, but I don’t have time for it /I’m too caught up in my everyday life

Maybe it’s like this: “I just don’t have time. I’m trying hard, but I just can’t take a step forward. ”

Or, even worse, like this: “I have a family and zero time for myself. If I have a rest in the toilet for 5 minutes, that’s luxury.”

No time for yourself and your desires. This is, of course, a big dilemma.

There are time management trainers who claim that “no time” actually means that it has merely no priority for you.

For me, it’s a platitude because it ignores how we humans work.

I always compare this with these funny notices on the subject of “first aid” or “behaviour in the event of a fire”.

What is always at the top?

Right: “1. Keep Calm!”

And the hint is certainly meant well … But how many people can do this in an emergency? So if someone is bleeding on the floor?

A little bit of adrenaline is quite normal and human …

And it is the same with our supposedly “wrongly set” priorities.

Everyday life behaves like a black hole. It eats all your time and energy.

Most people feel that way.

Even if you set your wish as the top priority … Everyday life will take over again at some point. And you have to take active countermeasures so that this doesn’t happen.

There are two possible solutions.

Solution 1: Go small steps

If you have a full life, fighting it doesn’t help.

Lower your unrealistic demands on yourself. And try to shovel yourself 5 minutes each day for the next small step towards your wish.

Five minutes that may sound ridiculous …

But our participants from the Success Experience course are living proof that this approach of small steps works excellent.

Solution 2: look behind the dark curtain

Sometimes it is also the case that you have the time. But for some reason you can’t explain, you’d better do a thousand other things first.

And at the end of the day, you say to yourself: “I didn’t have time, I had so much to do … ”

This is a typical diversion. Something in you still resists your wish. And “no time” is just an excuse for you not to have to deal with it.

Either because your wish scares you.

Or because it’s exhausting.

Or because it requires consequences.

Whatever it is … there is still a more profound level behind the pretext “no time”.

In that case, you have to take a look behind the curtain, which is precisely what is stopping you from wanting.

The following reasons could await you behind the curtain:

3. I’m scared. Fear of failure. Afraid of making the wrong decision. Afraid to disappoint other people …

I’m afraid:

  • Afraid to leave my comfort zone.
  • Fear of change.
  • Fear of uncertainty.
  • Fear of the new.

Whatever your case may be … If your wish also brings fear at the same time, then it is perfectly logical that you prefer to put it on the back burner.

For most people, avoiding fear is the standard ‘factory setting’ with which we are equipped from birth.

But what can you do if your wish scares you? If it also includes uncomfortable distances?

Let yourself be inspired by the success of others who may have been at the same point as you.

That should give you some useful approaches to address your fears.

4. I do not know if I want this / I have doubts whether it is right for me

In your thoughts, you picture it all with your wish, all beautiful.

But the very next moment, your inner doubter comes on the scene and says:

“Yes, but is that really the case?

Does it make you happier?

Aren’t you just imagining it?

You don’t know, and you want to work so hard now? ”

Lack of clarity. Before I invest a lot of time and energy in a wish that later turns out to be an illusion, I’d rather watch a good film tonight … Who doesn’t know that?

It is a very natural behaviour. The path of least resistance.

But before you miss your own life in the TV armchair and don’t seriously pursue any of your wishes, just provide a little more clarity.

Get a very clear picture of what you really want.

Because there is nothing better than having a clear goal in mind that you are 100% convinced of and that you can work towards.

A common thread in your life, a precise meaning, that gives you infinite happiness.

But how do you get such clarity?

You gain such a form of clarity by getting to know your values ​​that make sense of your life.

All of this can help you find out if your wish is right for you.

The doubts about what you want are only one side of the coin …

5. I don’t think I can / I can’t do it

The last reason is probably the biggest hurdle for all of us: self-doubt.

If you have cleared all other obstacles and are still staying a bit longer, then you have met the ‘final boss’: your self-doubts.

Your self-doubts are exciting because they are the ultimate encounter with yourself and your deepest convictions.

Thoughts like:

  • “I don’t know if I can do it,”
  • “What if I fail?”
  • “Did I even deserve this?”

or other negative beliefs. How can you deal with it?

Of course, there is no one-size-fits-all solution for this, but rather many different approaches. Such as the following:

  • You can analyze and change your attitudes and beliefs using this 4-step method.
  • You can rewrite your negative beliefs.
  • You can change your beliefs with the help of affirmations.
  • Or you keep it with someone who needs to know. One who was excluded from his school team during school and then became the best basketball player of all time: Michael Jordan.

Michael Jordan was a hero of my youth. The man was just a machine. How he managed to achieve top performances with ease, and in such a dignified manner without being overbearing …

It almost looked like he had been sent by another star to show everyone else what a person can do with his body.

And this Michael Jordan once said:

“You have to expect things from yourself before you can do them.” – Michael Jordan

And with that, we are at the core of it all: your self-image.

Your self-image is the key to fulfilling your wishes. You have to believe in yourself. You have to think it possible that you can achieve your dream. And that you deserve it too.

And who or what can give you this belief if not yourself?

So work on your self-image. And make your wishes realistic and attainable for you.

Fulfillment of wishes summarized for you again

So how can you deal with the most significant hurdles on the way to your dreams?

  1. Try to realize your wish in the small version. Try to satisfy the need behind the wish.
  2. Trick your everyday life and proceed in small steps.
  3. Address your fears and debunk them as much as possible.
  4. Create clarity. Get a clear picture of where you want to go.
  5. Strengthen your self-image so that your wish becomes possible.

Wishes are great if you can find ways and means to fulfill them.

So see which hurdle on your path to desire most stumbles you. And then tackle this hurdle constructively.

Because fulfilling your wishes yourself is just a wonderful feeling.

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life challenges

How to deal with changes in 5 steps

Change can be difficult to deal with, even when it’s for the better. You don’t have to be afraid of change. It often offers you new opportunities to grow.



Changes are part of life. We deal with changes more quickly when it is positive. Sometimes we don’t realize that things have changed in a positive sense. It is different when it comes to detrimental changes that we have not chosen ourselves. We often feel resistance to these new situations. We have more trouble with it. It can cause you to fear but also anger.

We tend to push change, especially the ones we didn’t choose ourselves. We want to keep everything old and familiar.

We consider our comfort zone as the only safe zone. This applies both at work and in your private life.

Unfortunately, these negative situations are also part of life.

Everyone sometimes has to deal with situations where you have no influence on which threatens your comfort zone.

You can think of losing someone you care about, losing your job, but also significant changes at work, for example.

Your function changes, so you experience a lot of stress. In short, all things that feel negative and that you have not chosen yourself.

You probably recognize it. You get angry, and you feel powerless, you don’t know what to do with a situation that causes you a lot of stress but also fears.

Do you keep worrying and don’t know how to proceed?

How do you deal with changes?

You lose the balance in your life; you want to regain balance in your life.

If you recognize yourself in the above, I advise you to continue reading.

I will give you tips on how to deal with the resistance to these situations and the fear of change.

You learn how to regain control. No matter how big or small the difference is.

Stop complaining and name-calling

Resistance to changes that you do not control can not get you further.

You’ve probably noticed that complaining, name-calling, and getting angry only adds to your stress and makes you feel worse.

You only get more negative thoughts. It is essential to yourself that you learn to stop thinking negatively.

If you have visited my blog before, you know that I am an advocate of mental self-analysis.

If you visit my blog for the first time, I will explain what this means. Mental self-analysis is to get to know yourself better.

The positive things about you but also your pitfalls.

In this case, it means that you have to write down the negative situation you are in, but also write down your emotions such as anger and fear.

In this way, you gain insight into your feelings, which hinders you from accepting the changes and not resist them.

Describes the situation in which you find yourself

First, I advise you to buy a separate notebook for yourself. If you prefer to do it with a bullet journal, that is, of course, also possible.

It is your personal preference, which counts.

The most important thing is that it is your notebook that you use for this personal development because you also want to be able to see your changes.

Be the first to describe the change you are struggling with for yourself. Use your own words. It doesn’t have to be a beautiful story.

Try to write down your emotions such as anger, fear or even anger.

It doesn’t matter how.

Throw out your feelings in writing. Nobody has to read this. It is entirely your own story and passion.

It often happens that your tears suddenly run free.

Just let this happen. It is okay if your emotions come up as you write.

The purpose of writing down your own experience is that you can throw out everything you sometimes don’t do with other people.

You bottle it up. It is your personal story and your own pent-up emotions.

Above all, be honest with yourself when you write. Don’t worry, write down what you feel.

Some people find it strange to write, but I can assure you that it helps.

I challenge you to do this. Sometimes it is not possible to write down your whole story at once because it evokes too many emotions.

This does not matter. Just continue with it the next day until you complete the entire story for yourself.

Release the tension and give the changes a chance

Now that you have written down your whole story, you know all the emotions that play a role in this change.

You know which emotions resist you from these changes.

You recognize all negative emotions and the tension in your body.

You should have thrown everything out on paper.

Now it is crucial to get this tension out of your body.

You can do this by looking for outdoor activities and taking a pleasant walk, but of course also by exercising or cycling.

A way to learn well to relax your muscles and your head are, for example, mindfulness, yoga or meditation (if you have never done this, you can use guided meditation).

If you have a hobby where you always got a lot of relaxation, it’s time to get yourself to do this again.

In short, your body and mind rest together.

It will not always immediately succeed in finding relaxation, but the most important thing is that you try it in any case.

You can’t get any further by sitting on the couch alone, kneeling or lying in your bed.

Become aware of what you have

Become aware of what you have and what you are grateful for. Every time you worry about the situation, ask yourself these two questions:

Do these thoughts help me feel better?
Do these thoughts help me change the situation?

Your answer will often or always be a resounding “no.”

Just asking these two questions will make you aware that you will not change the situation with negative feelings.

That way, you teach yourself that it makes no sense to resist.

You only have yourself with it if you stick around and don’t embrace the change no matter how difficult it can be at times.

If you have negative feelings or fear, it is compelling to ask these two questions to yourself and write them down in your notebook.

Try to find a solution to how you can feel better. Also, consider a positive thought list.

You can read how to make these in the article: Negative thoughts?

Make a positive thought list. It’s a trick to change your mindset.

If you want to know more about how you can change your mindset, I have a book recommended for you so that you can delve even more into your mindset.

It also teaches you to make changes in your life.

Changes also offer opportunities

If you know through self-analysis where your fear of change comes from, you also learn that you should not resist change.

You don’t have to be afraid of change. It often also offers new opportunities.

New situations keep you growing. It is up to you whether you take a positive view or that you stick with negative behaviour.

You will only learn to grow and grow by developing yourself. On this website, you will find various articles that can teach you to be stronger in your shoes.

For example, you can learn to gain confidence, or maybe you should learn to stop worrying.


Change starts with you

Remember that change begins with yourself. This also applies to how you deal with changes.

I hope you get started with these tips to learn how to deal with changes.

What do you find challenging about changes?

Of course, I like to hear what you find challenging about changes.

Have you already started not to resist but to see opportunities in a change in your life?

Or have you made modifications to your goals more visible?

Let me know in a comment.

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